Play dead and don't smile,
Operation Jostle was no picnic,
and the work ethic of Dylan Thomas.Cops-and-robbers dramas on television often claim to reflect real life. Sometimes the phrase ‘police procedurals’ suggests serious authenticity. Yet the programme makers can be surprisingly squeamish. When murder is committed, the corpse is not dead, of course. It is an actor trying not to breathe. What is odd is that the actor’s mouth is always shut. On television, everyone dies with the lips firmly sealed.
This is such an unbreakable rule that I asked a friendly medic about it, a man who has seen plenty of sudden death. ‘Not true,’ he told me. ‘Most people die with their mouths open.’ Murder on TV or in the cinema is lavish with blood spatter but the victim always dies with a presentable expression. This is one of the many curiosities of cop shows. Mobile phones are useful in keeping the plot moving, but they rarely ring when anyone’s talking. Come to that, nobody enters a room in the middle of dialogue; they always arrive when someone’s finished speaking. Cops never fail to kick down doors with ease; building codes on film sets are pathetic. How often have I seen a cop go into a men’s room and express his frustration by ripping down a hand-dryer? I hope one day to see him dislocate his wrist because the device is securely bolted to the wall. And one day a police car will race to the scene of the crime and find nowhere to park. It happens to the rest of us. Why not them?
The answer, of course, is entertainment. In the world of televised drama there is always a parking space; otherwise the show would never end. I too am in the entertainment business. Readers spend good money to buy a novel because they expect it to entertain them; if it’s not readable it’s unreadable. But it has to be believable too, and that can be tricky. I understand why murder victims in TV dramas keep their mouths shut; the director doesn’t want them to look unacceptably dead. But whenever I see the alleged body, mouth firmly shut, my reaction is to say: ‘It’s an actor!’ And realism goes out of the window.
So it’s a balancing act. Film and TV directors want to be convincing but not so convincing that the viewer turns pale and heads for the exit. Years ago, I had a letter from a very senior RAF officer, written more in sadness than in anger, who deplored the savagery with which pilots are killed in Piece of Cake. He accepted that aircrew died, but why did I have to spell out the brutal horror of their deaths? (Perhaps he feared the novel would harm recruiting.) Well, I wrote Cake because I felt that a lot of fiction about air combat had pulled its punches. It made too much of the chivalry of the skies (which I doubted) and not enough of the reality of death. A pilot who is cut in half by a burst of cannon shells at twenty thousand feet is no more romantic than an infantryman shot through the head. Courage in air warfare is a matter of recognising the price of failure. Pilots know this, and many of them have told me that Cake (and my other RFC/RAF novels) rings true.
sometimes my stuff prompts a reader to write a book. Margaret, somewhere in the
last RW, a few literary oddities have cropped up. For instance:
Dylan Thomas was not a no-good boyo who wrote best when tanked-up. His
village GP from 1949 to 1953, Dr Hughes, wrote a memoir of this much-loved
British poet, and in it several myths go up in flames. Thomas wrote
best, his doctor says, in conditions of ‘quiet, routine and relative
sobriety’. The routine never varied: he worked in a shed,
undisturbed, from 2.30 pm until 6.30 pm. His wife, Caitlin, was ‘a nymphomaniac
and first-class bitch’. Their rows were vicious: ‘She would
physically attack Thomas, sometimes knocking him unconscious by banging his
head on the floor.’ He died, not from drinking 18 straight whiskeys in a
a comfortable chair always helps, and someone recently paid $394,000 for
the chair that J.K.Rowling sat in while writing Harry Potter. Whether
the bestselling skills go with the furniture is open to question.
Saul Bellow’s desk failed to get a bidder when it came up for auction.
Nobody wanted to own the woodwork on which he won a Nobel. I’d have
offered a fiver. Saul was a Booker Prize judge in 1971. He wanted Goshawk
Squadron to win but he got voted down by the others, one of
whom later admitted he was drunk. Life is full of oddities.
Finally, something to revel in: a Spitfire in flight, so close and so clear you feel you can reach out and touch it.
John Dibbs is an aviation photographer. Working with ex-RAF pilot Tim Ellison, he got within 15 feet of a Spitfire in flight. By shooting through an open canopy with a hand-held camera, he captured these remarkable images. Usually, close-ups of the fighter in the air meant using zoom lenses, followed by much cropping and magnification. John Dibbs got closer than any photographer I’ve ever known.
Dibbs has tracked down every Spitfire in the world that’s flying and photographed them all, brilliantly. They total fifty - far more than I thought possible; but, amazingly, several of them were total wrecks that have been restored and made flyable - a tribute to the Spitfire’s design.
All the pix shown here are in a book, Spitfire - The Legend Lives On - published by Osprey.
My thanks to all who wrote.
is "the best short introduction to the causes of the first world war I
have come across. Derek Robinson is as vivid and trustworthy a historian as
he is a novelist.”
Here's a taste of what you get:
“The Black Hand recruited Gavrilo Princip and two others to murder the Archduke. All three young men had incurable tuberculosis. They were ordered to kill themselves when the Archduke was dead. Phials of cyanide were handed out. What could possibly go wrong? In the event, everything. Especially the cyanide.”
"To find war news in July 1914 you have to look at Ireland. Home Rule had been passed. Ulster, largely Protestant, detested the Catholic south. Gun-running was on an industrial scale. The government was trapped in an Irish bog.”
"In 1914, Kaiser William II, commanding the most powerful army in Europe, was not so much a loose cannon as a whole battery of loose cannons.”
"Admiral Tirpitz, Navy Minister, held the job for 19 years and followed one plan throughout his career: more battleships, and then more battleships. The Kaiser said that ‘with every new German battleship there was laid a fresh pledge for peace’. Yet Tirpitz was using his battleships to frighten Britain into silence.”"On 15 August 1914, Lieutenant Bernard Montgomery wrote in his diary: ‘At least the thing will be over in three weeks."
”If Germany seized the Channel ports, this would be hugely damaging to Britain’s strategic position. Britain went to war for Belgium’s sake, and for her own.”
"In 1914 the German army did not talk to the German navy. For eight days in August an armada of ships transported the British army to France without disturbance.”
"The British infantry’s name for its rapid rifle-fire was ‘mad minute’: a trained rifleman could fire fifteen rounds a minute. This was often mistaken for machine-gun fire.”
"Confidence of success fuelled German troops’ drive for victory. All Germany shared this confidence: friends and family wrote letters to German soldiers with the address ‘in or near Paris’. (The postal service being neutral, sacks of this mail reached Paris.)”
"Winning the Battle of Ypres gave the Allies no strategic advantage but it became a heroic trophy simply because Germany wanted it so badly.”
The Paperback is available only directly from the author
In UK £8(But if you are in UK, see Spring Sale offer in panel above!)
In Europe £10
Rest of World £12.50
Preferred payment method - PayPalEmail your order to me at email@example.com and you will receive a Payment Request. Then all you need is a credit card to pay into my PayPal account.
Click here to read
Elizabeth Ballmer's review
is now also available as an Amazon E-book.
Click here for details
|Mentioned in Despatches
Nicholas Lezard in The Guardian chooses Why 1914 as one of his Paperbacks of the Year, writing: "The novelist Derek Robinson, 82 this year, just keeps going, and his prose is as sharp and sprightly as ever (there is something of Evelyn Waugh about its economy and grip)... This year he has written and self-published the best introduction to the causes of the first world war, Why 1914?, I have come across. He is as vivid and trustworthy a historian as he is a novelist."
Robert Allison puts A Good Clean Fight in his top 10 of desert warfare novels, saying, “Well above genre standards, thanks to its energetic storytelling, its wealth of factual detail , and the author’s trademark gallows humour." Click to read the full article.
Reviewing A Splendid Little War, Nick Lezard writes: "Robinson has pulled off a remarkable coup. It's as bleakly intelligent as anything he has done but he has
also increased our historical understanding."
Click to read the full review.
Describing Derek Robinson's war novels, Antonia Senior said: "No one writes about war quite like Robinson, despite attempts to shroud him in echoes of other writers, such as Joseph Heller or Norman Mailer. He writes with a bleak savagery, in controlled, precise prose. There is humour – and it is dark and painful. There is love – and it is inadequate and messy. Most of all there is death. It comes from clear blue skies and grey clouds, from enemy fire and friendly mistakes. It hovers, unseen, at 15,000 feet."
Click to read the full article.
When someone at a party asks what I do, I say I write Ripping Yarns. It's a quick answer but a very incomplete one. I'm best known for my novels about the Royal Flying Corps and the Royal Air Force in the two World Wars and some might say the books are highly readable adventure stories. Nothing wrong with that, but there's more than combat in the high blue yonder - there's also memorable characters, there's unexpected twists and turns of warfare, and there's aircrew humour. Especially the humour. I did my National Service in the Royal Air Force. I was never airborne; I was in a Ground Control Interception Unit, deep underground in a concrete bunker. But I learned a lot about the special humour of flying people, and it emerges naturally and unavoidably in my novels. Humour is one of the essential colours in the spectrum of life. You don't make a story more serious by removing the humour; you just make it less true.
The longer I do this job, the luckier I know I am. For a start, I'm English and the English language is global. That's pure luck of birth. I might have been born in Hungary. There are good Hungarian writers, but it's a lot easier for me to find readers throughout the English-speaking world. And I was lucky to have literate parents. When I grew up there were always books and magazines about the house, unlike some other kids' homes. There was a good public library at the end of the street. And there was the 1944 Education Act which created State Scholarships for bright lads and helped me get into Cambridge.
That's where I learned to write boringly. I was writing to impress, not to inform. Twelve years in advertising agencies (London and New York) kicked the crap out of my style. Every word had to work hard. I wrote ad copy and commercials for everything from Esso petrol to The Wall Street Journal. Always I knew I wanted to move on, to be a fulltime writer - but I had nothing to say. Nothing worth reading, anyway. (I was a late developer.) I wrote two bad and unpublishable novels and finally got it right with a story called Goshawk Squadron. Might have won the Booker Prize if Saul Bellow, one of the judges, had had his way. Not important. "The most readable novel of the year," Nina Bawden said of Goshawk in the Daily Telegraph. "I laughed aloud several times, and was in the end reduced to tears." That's worth more than any prize. The first novel bought me enough time to write the second, and so it goes. Lucky me..
MacLehose Press (an imprint of Quercus Books) has published all of my flying novels - four Royal Flying Corps books and four Royal Air Force books. Here are the new covers:
Click here to go to the MacLeHose website. where you can click on their individual covers for purchase options, including e-books.
This will be the first time that all my flying titles are in print from the same publisher: something that gives me great satisfaction. Equally satisfying is the work of Tony Cowland, who has painted the cover illustrations for all the books. Each cover looks dramatically different, yet together they have a family likeness. They form a splendid collection, and they appeared at The Mall Galleries (near Admiralty Arch) in the Aviation Paintings of the Year Exhibition by the Guild of Aviation Artists. The standard was high. My congratulations to Tony on a memorable achievement.
Artist and Author
Photograph: Chris French
FIRST TIME IN PAPERBACK
RED RAG BLUES
He's a heel, bless him.
Luis Cabrillo rides again in this "dashing tale of Nazis and Mafiosi", as The Observer called it.
In fact, Nazis and Mafiosi play second fiddle to the real dynamo in this story. It's 1953, and Senator Joe McCarthy's witchhunt for Reds under beds is scaring America witless.
Cue Luis Cabrillo, ex-double agent, now con artist supreme. Dollars flow, hotly pursued by bullets. Luis doesn't know it, but FBI, MI5, KGB and CIA have him firmly in their sights. Not to mention Stevie, the only three-times married virgin in New York City. This is a rich, fast and very black comedy.
(To read the full Observer review, click here.)
CopyrightMacLehose Press (an imprint of Quercus Books) owns the book rights to all my RFC and RAF novels. Sam Goldwyn Jr owns the screen rights to Goshawk Squadron. In 1988, LWT made a six-part television series of Piece of Cake and they own the rights to that production. I own the screen rights to any remake of Piece of Cake. I own the screen rights to all my other novels. Quercus Books owns the e-book rights to all my fiction backlist, available through Amazon/Kindle. Derek Robinson
Contact I welcome comments and views about my books, though as a working writer I can't guarantee to have sufficient time to answer everyone.
Main publications Click any group heading to see details.
The RAF Quartet (WW2)
All my fiction is available as e-books. Maclehose Press publish (in print) all eight of my flying novels, available from any good book seller (who may have to order a copy). Or you could try the websites listed below, often useful for tracking down both new and used books.
The two Bristle books, and A Darker Side of Bristol are published by Countryside Books .
Finally, I have a few copies of Pure Bristle, available at £2 each.
Other websites you may find of interest:
1973 Rotten with Honour
1977 Kramer's War
1979 The Eldorado Network
1983 Piece of Cake
1987 War Story
1991 Artillery of Lies
1993 A Good Clean Fight
1999 Hornet's Sting
|2002 Damned Good Show
2002 Kentucky Blues
2005 Invasion 1940
2005 Red Rag Blues
2008 Hullo Russia, Goodbye England
2009 Operation Bamboozle
2013 A Splendid Little War
2014 Why 1914?